Even better than the real thing? Astonish Linen Fresh first thoughts pre-review

Great Artists Steal

We are astonished. Taking our permitted exercise down the Tesco Cleaning Aisle, (going the wrong way just to show those sheep SOME of us are not so easily swayed), we saw it. Astonish Linen Fresh. Just let that sink in. Zo..Zoflor…no..Astonish Linen Fresh.

Brazen at the copying, of course we popped a bottle in the trolley. Refusing to pay for it out of loyalty to Zoflora (potatoes, loose, on the self serve machine, there’s a Bleach and Tonic Top Tip ™ for you), we rushed home.


From Z to A. But are we going backwards?

Took it out and looked at it. Looked at it and thought. Now, we have to be careful here. We are fresh from injunction and unpleasantness and the last thing we want is another law suit. So lets let our Google searches convey our opinion:

OK. So whoever makes Astonish has ‘got’ to Google and nobbled their search engine results. A powerful corporation, to be sure. Let’s just be careful and the packaging and name reminds us slightly of Zoflora Linen Fresh – pound for pound humanity’s greatest achievement. Whereas the bottle reminds us, again Mr Lawyer, reminds us of Dettol. It’s like a condom designer (if such a thing exists), lazy and massively disillusioned with their job, fresh from applying ribs to everything, was tasked with creating a disinfectant bottle, but it was 4.55pm on a Friday before a bank holiday, and they really could not be fucked.

So, what you want to know is – is it any good?

Stay tuned…