
Anyway, as we cast our eyes silently up to the heavens, or at least the terrible terrible roof, we saw this:
 and the bully (domestos) on the school bus.
‘Don’t be shy’ we thought. We might even have said it aloud. We hope not but we have to face the fact that we might have.
After checking that it definitely wasn’t a hateful ‘ecover’ product in disguise, we picked it up. For some reason, perhaps the lower case ‘m’ in the ‘method’, we got the impression it was an import from France. The neck of the bottle was slender. It was very chic. Certainly something cool enough to leave out on the coffee table when friends came over, to impress them in the manner that my mother used to with the ‘history of time’ book.
We were dubious, though. Something about it reeked of ‘environmentaly friendly’, which we hate in a toilet cleaner. We don’t want the namby pambiness of ecover on our germs. We want the remorseless, terminator style bullying of Domestos.
Anyway, we opened it and sniffed. If you can taste wine in fancy dan restaurants before they fill the glass up, you sure as shit can sniff a disenfectant before you buy it. A much bigger commitment.
It smelt nice, subtle but nice. The subtlety, combined with the shyness of the packaging and the loneliness of the space made us buy it. It looked so alone, crowded between bullies and cool things. Confident things. We knew how it felt.
Then we looked to our left:
There’s shelves of the fucking stuff! They look guady as kiddies fake plastic jewels, and look, surprise surprise there is the ecover
![Imgur](http://i.imgur.com/IxjKftE.jpg”/>
When we got back, disgusted, we looked on the website. lower case letters, meant it started out promisingly enough, but then we got to ‘biodegradable’ and gave up.
![Imgur](http://i.imgur.com/NrxuNG1.png”/>
We haven’t really used it. We’re dissapointed. We thought we’d stumbled accross a rare lost treasure. In reality, though, we’d just happened across an outlier for another ‘oh look how green we are’ shit brand. Doutless tesco put it there making it look shy, an experiment in placement vs sales. Fuck you with your experiments, tesco. Fewer expermients and Alidi dalliances, fewer eco shit and more Bloo if you please. No wonder you are on the skids.
We went back to the car and home to the family which was waiting there for us.